an almost silly request

Postby **Ashley** » Tue Aug 19, 2003 2:04 pm

Hey guys, this is a rather....awkward request.
I um, was just asked on a date for the first time...and aside from being a little nervous, I'm also a little hesitant. I mean, I already said yes, but the whole "protecting your gift"/purity thing has been impounded into my head, and I'd just appriciate a little extra prayers tonight. We're supposedly--with the consent of both parental parties--going to a baseball game in Houston (go Astros!), and then straight home, so I know I won't be in odd alone time situations. Still, it would make me feel a whole lot better if I knew I had some people just praying an extra layer of protection for tonight. Thanks.

Postby **ShiroiHikari** » Tue Aug 19, 2003 2:21 pm

Awwww...yay! :] But I can understand being nervous, girl. I shall pray ^^

Postby **Rashiir** » Tue Aug 19, 2003 4:23 pm

Jeff Kent is the man. Oh, right, the date...be sure to wear something modest...I'll pray too.

Postby **shooraijin** » Tue Aug 19, 2003 7:17 pm

It's *not* an odd prayer request!

Wilco.

Postby **Spiritsword** » Tue Aug 19, 2003 7:47 pm

I will pray for you, Ash. Not a silly prayer request at all.

No comment regarding the Astros. I've been trying to avoid that topic for some time now.

Spiritsword

Postby **inkhana** » Tue Aug 19, 2003 8:14 pm

This may be a bit belated, but I pray you are safe and having a great time...

!

Postby **Saint** » Tue Aug 19, 2003 8:34 pm

Relationships are a serious thing, even dating ones. I will keep your request in mind. We'll be praying.

Postby **Ashley** » Tue Aug 19, 2003 9:05 pm

Ok, date over. It was interesting...I mean, it wasn't what I thought it would be, but it wasn't bad either. Rather fun, once we stopped being nervous. We ended up seeing only part of the baseball game, caught a cab, tried to catch a movie (didn't work), got back to the stadium and met with his parents.
And I could kinda tell he wasn't trying to get in my pants, which was relieving. And he was pretty polite, but he did try to hold my hand or the whole arm-shoulder-yawn thing. But he was courteous about it, which suprised me.
The only downside is he claims to be an atheist. :sob: Which just means I'm going to need extra prayer, because I don't want to get in that non-christian dating christian THING.
But yeah, it was good. And he didn't ask to kiss me, which was better!

Postby **Saint** » Tue Aug 19, 2003 9:11 pm

While i won't get involved in your desicions, i would strongly recommend agianst even dating someone that isn't a christian. // you can still have fun, and ministry with people as a friend or in a group. // and its a good thing he didn't try to mess with you. he'd have a lot of people angry at him.

Postby **inkhana** » Tue Aug 19, 2003 9:25 pm

Yes, I'd've had to get out all the pitchforks and...why are you looking at me like that...?

Well, anyway, I'm glad everything worked out for you.

Postby **Rashiir** » Tue Aug 19, 2003 11:38 pm

I guess I'd better keep praying.

Postby **Rev. Doc** » Wed Aug 20, 2003 12:14 pm

Although she may hate me for it...my daughter will be courted.

Postby **Gypsy** » Wed Aug 20, 2003 1:32 pm

Rev. Doc wrote:Although she may hate me for it...my daughter will be courted.

She'll love you for it later. When I turned 16, my Dad made up a contract that the guy would have to sign under penalty of loss of appendages. He still jokes about it.

Anyway, Ash. You already know how I feel about getting romantically involved with someone who doesn't have a growing relationship with Christ - let alone someone who doesn't believe in God. If anyone would like to know my views on such things, please PM me and I'd be happy to share.

But yeah, Ash. I was/still will be praying.

Postby **Rashiir** » Wed Aug 20, 2003 2:56 pm

I strongly sense the presence of the chair example...

Postby **uc pseudonym** » Wed Aug 20, 2003 4:59 pm

When I originally saw that the situation was already over, I figured the need for prayer was gone... how wrong I was. Without making any sort of judgements or suggestions, I think all I can say is that I'll be praying.

Postby **shooraijin** » Wed Aug 20, 2003 9:18 pm

> Although she may hate me for it...my daughter will be courted.

Be sure you buy Kevlar well in advance. :grin:

First, Ban all the Trolls. . . · Postby **MillyFan** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 2:56 am

Praying if I remember (LOL, I'm forgetful sometimes so please don't count on me. . .)

As for the whole relationships thing, I've given up on it. The first guy I thought I loved turned out to be controlling and threatened suicide when I finally chose to leave him. The second wasn't controlling or suicidal or anything but was. . .let's just say. . .weird. . .even for an otaku. We broke up (although that was much more amicable and we were still friends) however I fear that he may have ended up in jail for something (unrelated to me).

Thing is, I never felt that deeply anyway, although I really tried to and hoped that I could, the best I could really feel was deep friendship and concern which I misconstrued as "love."

It's been a hard lesson to learn, but I've learned it and decided that my life would be much better without attempting to be in a relationship.

One of the reasons I tried in the first place for anything beyond friendships was so that I wouldn't be punished by God if I had bad thoughts. However, after examining myself and my life, I've realized that I'd rather simply take the punishment than live my life in a relationship only so I could get away with a little more than I could otherwise.

Another reason I felt pressured into relationships was that I felt that I had to continue the family because my sister is too shy to find someone and people hate her because of her weight. However, there are many other ways to leave a legacy with your life than getting married and having children.

Point of this pointless post: I've given up on romantic relationships and on looking for "Mr. Right" for good, because there is no "Mr. Right" for me. And my life is so much better. -^.^-

Postby **Ashley** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 3:43 pm

Well, another update. Mom and I talked a lot, and I realized I may (read: did) over-react a bit to things. First of all, I'm not marrying the guy; now yes, dating is extremely serious, and I'm not shrugging it off as an excuse to fool around. But it is unlikely that I'll actually end up married to him, considering we're both 16.
Secondly, more importantly, Mom pointed out something pretty important: God already planned this relationship--if it's even old enough to be called that--for a reason. It could be to introduce him to true Christianity (he went to a church but hated it); it could be to plant some seeds, etc. But for now, I'm not going to obsess over it. I'll just take things as they come, and not back down on my values.

Postby **Rashiir** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 4:23 pm

It could even be to help you decide not to back down on your values.

Postby **Ashley** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 4:26 pm

Oh yeah, I should clarify I found out about his "religious beliefs" AFTER I agreed (and after we were in Houston). I'd never intentionally try missionary dating. Just thought I should clarify that.

Postby **Benu** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:07 pm

Glad every thing went ok Ashley. But that's a shocker about his religious beliefs.

Postby **Rashiir** » Thu Aug 21, 2003 7:13 pm

It might be worthwhile trying to find out about a prospective date's religious beliefs beforehand, but I dunno.

Postby **uc pseudonym** » Fri Aug 22, 2003 3:47 pm

Is he really atheist, or is he an agnostic? Further more, is he of the opened, closed or ignostic variety?

Postby **Ashley** » Fri Aug 22, 2003 10:59 pm

to Rashiir: well, to be honest, I made the stupid mistake of assuming. Add to that the fact it was very, very spontaneous, and that's just how it ended up. Future reference noted, trust me.
To UC: I'm not sure *what* he is exactly. I am sure that if this is to continue, God will provide an opportunity for him to open up to me about it. Then again, these things take time, precious though it is. I've learned that sometimes--especially in cases like his, where the unbeliever has a bad taste/view of the church in his mouth/eyes--you have to develop a relationship before you go out and evangelize to them. Otherwise they get the impression they never meant anything to you, and were merely a stepping stone to some spiritual rank. Anyway, I really do appriciate all your prayers guys.

Postby **Rashiir** » Sat Aug 23, 2003 9:40 pm

Wait, you don't even know this guy? You could have gotten yourself into big trouble young lady...

Postby **Gypsy** » Mon Aug 25, 2003 3:04 pm

*bites tongue*

an almost silly request

an almost silly request

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