Truth Soldiers - (NEW) Christian Manga by Fred Keel

[FKeel]

Truth Soldiers (Official Website of the Manga)
http://www.truthsoldiers.webs.com

Ratings:

Age Range: 13+
Truth Soldiers will deal with a very scary situation that all of us Christians in America hope will very come true: losing our religious freedom. My aim is to keep this manga suitable for teens and young adults.

Violence: 65%
There will not be any over-the-top blood and gore violence in Truth Soldiers. Mainly just car explosions and just a small hint of blood at times, but nothing over the top.

Language: None.

Sexuality / Nudity: None.
No plans to have anything sexual involved with this story.

Religion:
This manga will primarily be openly Christian that will bring the good news of Jesus Christ. The main characters will be put in situations where they need to defend their faith against alot of human philosophy and against the forces of evil. My hope is that it will help someone who doesn't know Jesus Christ as their Savior and Lord.


Storyline:
What if we were not One Nation Under God? What if all of the freedom we take for granted was taken away from us? In the early 21st century, that nightmare comes true.

America reached its point of wanting to destroy anything dealing with religion. It began when an athiest named Arthur Lexington ran for the President of the United States. Upon winning his election and with the support of a legion of athiest followers, his first act known as the No-Religion Act was passed. The No-Religion Act gave President Lexington the equal right to have the First Amendment changed.

"Congress shall make no law regarding an establishment of religion. Congress shall make no law regarding the freedom of speech."

It was replaced with the following:
"Congress has the right to have religion play no part in the lifestyle and community of the United States of America. Mankind has no freedom of speech because mankind does not have a voice in this world."

Anyone caught making an establishment of religion was put to death. Tele-Evangelists were taken off the air and were put to death by hanging. Christian Radio stations and internet sites were taken down and its employees were put to death. Holy Bibles, the Quar'an, and Old Testament scrolls were burned in public gatherings on the streets. All churches, synagogues, and holy temples were brought to the ground: and the love and faith of millions was thought to be lost forever.

However in the year 2034, a secret underground organization was formed in order to bring America back to the way it needed to be. All members were to secretly find resources that could be used to deliver the message of love to a lost world. Their other objectives were to fight for the freedom they had lost and to take down the authorities that put them all in this Hell on Earth. However, their main goal was not to kill anyone, but to bring the message of love in the name of the Father, the Son, and Holy Spirit.

They called themselves Truth Soldiers.

[Warrior 4 Jesus]

I don't know, the art is good, although the Chief and the lead woman look identical to those in Ghost in the Shell (that's called plagiarising).
The writing starts off good but then the sermonising that happens later slows the pacing to a crawl, is cringe-worthy and out of place in that scene.
Show, don't tell.

I find it too overt. You have good intentions I know, but the way you've done it is a bit too much like much of Christian fiction.
Unless that's what you're aiming for - then it's good.

[FKeel]

Well just to clear everything up, I am influenced by Shirow Masamune (Ghost In The Shell) and I made sure that in the "Bio" page that I mentioned him as one of my influences while creating this manga.

Also, I did intend for this to be an "openly Christian" manga that would appeal to both teens and young adults. I definately mentioned this on my site. I also thought it was a great concept to have Christians in the future fighting for their faith and their freedom while at the same time delivering the message of Jesus Christ to those who need it the most.

Anyway, just wanted to clear that up. Sorry for the inconvenience. Godspeed.

[FKeel]

Not to be evil in any way, but I did site Shirow Masamune (Ghost In The Shell, Appleseed) as one of my influences while creating Truth Soldiers. You can check out the Biography page on the website site to see for yourself.

Also, I looked this up on Wikipedia:
Plagiarism is the practice of claiming or implying original authorship of someone else's written or creative work, in whole or in part, into one's own without adequate acknowledgement. Unlike cases of forgery, in which the authenticity of the writing, document, plagiarism is concerned with the issue of false attribution.

[whisperingloon]

Fred,

Keep it up, dude! It always excites me to see people who "do" and not just "talk". Don't be discouraged, look at every page as an opportunity to move onward and upward.

~ Ben

[uc pseudonym]

Not to be evil in any way, but I did site Shirow Masamune (Ghost In The Shell, Appleseed) as one of my influences while creating Truth Soldiers. You can check out the Biography page on the website site to see for yourself.

Obviously with something like this on the internet no one is going to come after you with a lawsuit. However, I do not believe that your reference on the biography page would be adequate as a legal citation. Most likely it would have to be included at the beginning of the comic itself.

[Danderson]

It looks like it could have some potential.....definetly an interesting idea.....how far along are u in it's creation?

[FKeel]

It looks like it could have some potential.....definetly an interesting idea.....how far along are u in it's creation?

As of now, what you see in the site is what I have done so far. The entire storyline of the first issue is written out, but what you see is what I have drawn out so far.

[mechana2015]

I would seriously consider reworking your character designs away from Ghost in the Shell designs for several reasons. Aside from that I'm wondering if you are open to full critique on this, or would rather it be let run its course.

[ChristianKitsune]

It's a good effort...but man... it's so "preachy." I'm sorry, but this was really hard to read... As a Christian I totally get what you are trying to do. But if a non-Christian were to pick this up, I doubt they would read it.

Also, you need to work on proportions a bit... to be blunt, the chief really scared me...